Friday 02:04:2021: I was at home feeling a bit weak even though it’s an holiday. I woke up quite a bit early to clean and wash clothes, do exercise and go back to bed with my laptop writing and working. My friend came over later that afternoon and asked we should go for a walk. I was abashed!! This same person I have been trying to drag with me for my daily walk Never wants to honour my daily walk with me, claiming I LOVE BUSH TOO MUCH!! Well, we went for a walk bought doner to eat in the park and took a stroll down the lahn (riverside). We walked for more than an hour and decided to go back home.
I got calls from my dad, spoke with my brother and my friend. We went off to sleep and my eyes 👀 were really open. I was so restless, 😬 I couldn’t focus and sleep like I always do after prayer or when in the middle of meditation I sleep off. I could not. My friend said why can’t you sleep and I said I do not know why, so I pretended to be asleep while I was wide awake so as not to disturb
03.04.2021; 07:00 am. I was awake and my friend went to read for an exam while I stayed in the room waiting for the time to fly by so I can drink my coffee and do my exercise. We worked on our various doings and then decided to leave for Frankfurt and then in Frankfurt we went shopping for Easter 🐣. I wanted to make waterleaf soup and then I found out that all this While I have been using the Feldsalat as waterleaf. (Which I cooked on the 21.03.2021 for my Sisters/bestfriends). I bought all our easters food went home and I was taking karrioff 🤣( you know what I mean). When we went home, we ate, and went to sleep. Again I could not sleep. I did not understand why but I was not frustrated because I felt ok maybe tomorrow would be better.
Today the 04.04.2021: is my Father and uncle birthday and I was happy for them and could only be happy because it is not only their birthday but Easter Sunday too!!! I wrote and shared to all my family and friend the Happy Easter wishes and put on some funny videos on my WhatsApp Status so my friends could laugh their asses off. But one person did not respond to my message. I checked severally because she is my bestfriend/sister but got no reply. So I called her and when I got no reply I thought she was with her family so I called my other bestfriend/sister (we are the three Musketeers) and she wished me a happy easter and I did wish her too all the best.
I called my family and they all were on celebration and I was so happy. I cooked the soup and it was so tasty. I ended my lent today with a champagne 🍾 and I got drunk because during the lent I gave up alcohol (I am sure that some can relate that if you have not taken alcohol for a while and then you take it, you get intoxicated easily KOLO). I went to sleep afterwards and still could not sleep properly.
O5.04.2021 it was a Monday and the Epic Heat Programm from Caroline Girvan https://www.carolinegirvan.com/was starting and i was pumped and so eager to start my workout. After I finished I made some Akara and salad. So we ate it like an Akara burger. Afterwards, I decided to have a nap. When I woke up after about an hour nap I got three missed call at about 14:15 from my friends Mama and her Brother. I was surprised why she called me so I called back. Hmmmm…… her son, my friends Brother picked the call and asked if I have heard from his Sister? I said huh? Today? Easter? I said no I sent her a message yesterday and got no reply so I told him to hang up let me call my other friends.
I called people I thought she could be with, and they said no they have also not heard from her in a while, so I called the mum back, and she said she has been trying to reach her since yesterday (Easter Sunday) since she was supposed to celebrate Easter with them. She said that she had sent her nephew to check at her house, which he did thrice but said all curtains were down, and it seems like she was not at home. So I told her to call the police and ask them to go to her house. I then called another friend close to her to please go check her up, but before she could get there, the Mum called to tell me that the police did not find her at home. We were all a bit relieved, thinking, ok, she would come back home. We then later suggested that since the brother has her keys, he should go to the house and check up on her, which he did, but you see, it’s a five hours journey. The calls in between were turmoil, rollercoaster, impatience, thinking, wishing, praying and also hoping that she was at least alright.
05.04.2021 10:30 pm the brother should be getting to her house. I called. He did not pick me, and my other friend called, and she said he is also not picking the call. We spoke for about 20 minutes, and I brushed my teeth for going to bed, knowing fully well that I will not sleep again. I was praying that she would be ok. By 11:00 pm, my friend called again and asked if I had heard anything from the brother, and I said no. Her mum also said her son is not picking up her calls. By midnight I was finished with worries because I was trying to calm my other friend that maybe he is with her now and they are quarrelling on why she is making us all go through stress.
I tried to lay down but could not by 01:13 am. I got missed call from a friend, and by 01:42, my friend called, and when I heard her voice, I knew it was over.
My heart bleeds, my heart is broken, my life is bleak, my soul groans, I wailed. My thread, Supporter, soft-spoken, always smiling, ever-loving no matter the stress or problems she is having, a Faithful God-loving woman, an excellent dancer, a worshipper of God, the most creative crochet maker, photographer, ever ready poser, never caught unaware, most intelligent teacher, patient with kids, the baddest tailor, makeup artist, the best hairstylist and Who would journey with us now? Who?? Our Peace, ever smiling, our driver, our calmness, crochet maker, earring and necklace maker(jeweler), tailor, hairdresser, photographer, model, poser, heavenly dancer, solutionist, prayer warrior, my elder sister, friend, kids lover, if she was with your child you can be rest assured your child is well, singer, always there for everyone, best listener, makeup artist!!!Information Technology graduate is DEAD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!¡!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.
08.04.2021 is three days now, and I am still in a loop. Prisca’s Mother and Poor brother who found her are still in a dream!!!!
Prisca PRISCA PRISCA PRISCA!!! Bikonu 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 , this is a shock that we all want to wake up from. But you are Gone, torn from us. The only comfort we can have is that you loved your God, and I am sure you are singing and dancing for him right now. The loss is so hard for a young, most talented woman to be gone so soon.
I am glad we could go on the last trip last week to Weilburg. I am so happy we all ate, danced, talked deeply, and I am so grateful to God that I always made you laugh. The 21.03.2021 was our sendoff unknowingly for you, (as a friend put it). I pray for the comfort of the Lord should be onto your Mother and family. They need it the most.
It’s been 24 days since you left us. We are still shocked, and I Pray God consoles and comforts your Mother, Brother, Uncle and other Family members. Even though it was a Painful Exist, we still give God the glory for a life well spent as yours. You birthed peace and love everywhere you went to, your Aura was so soothing and not to be compared with; your slowness to everything was a powerful tool that no one can imitate because even though you were slow, you were still fast. Little by little, it is coming to a Realisation and oh, we miss you so dearly.
I love you, we love you and thank goodness you knew it.
You are Gone, but never will be forgotten and always Cherished in our hearts.
Today’s Post will be focused on how we can heal our inner self with forgiveness and things that we can do to grow forward regardless of the pain you might have had for this situation or person.
You know how the word forgiveness is always thrown around like some piece of cake !! Very easy to say but one of the hardest thing to do? Oh, it is hard. I know it, and you also do know it is hard. Well, for some, it is easy to forgive, and for some, it is easy to say they have forgiven but always bring it up in every situation, which I can say I fall into that category, to be honest with you all. 😂
Forgiveness isn’t about agreeing with what they did. It’s also not allowing what they did to you to steal your peace of mind, your hope, happiness. It is about your healing.
First of all, I will start by writing about what forgiveness is not about because there is a lot of misconceptions about it;
Forgiveness is not being in denial about what the other person did to you. By them not taking responsibility for hurting you and how that wounded feeling has impacted your life, let’s take, for example, if you were abused or cheated on, you could not simply forget it never happened or deny that you cannot remember because those occurrences have affected you and therefore will have an impact on your upcoming relationship with someone else.
Forgiveness certainly does not mean Reconciliation. I can attest to this; My aunt hurt me so bad, and I had to forgive her so that I could grow and for my peace of mind, but I stopped calling, asking about her and just parted ways with her because we could not go back to how we were before. It was a very toxic relationship. You can forgive someone but choose never to have anything to do with that person again, maybe because of whatever you felt objected to in that relationship.
Secondly, let’s talk about what forgiveness is all about
Forgiveness is interpreted in a lot of ways, but the simplest to say is that no matter what has happened in any of our lives at this moment, we can be at peace, be it five minutes ago or five years ago. Forgiveness is an assertive or creation of peace in the present. People create a lack of stability, so we can also be the only people who can remedy the situation.
This step is an intentional and voluntary process by which you may have been offended, maltreated, injured or victimised, but choose to let go of the malice, hostility and bitterness raging up in you.
This step is an intentional decision you have to make by yourself, and let me tell you; it is not all ❤️. You will not like it or feel all contented afterwards. Being intentional is an option you decide to click on because you want to move past the experience of hurt and bitterness. The pain is holding you back on a lot of happiness, peace of mind, developing your potentials and freedom. When you realise that you keep going back to what that person had done to you and how it hurts, you would know that you are stuck in a place of unforgiveness, which inhibits your progress because you are still tied to that pain occurrence. Being Intentional about this is a process, and it means you have to walk it out
The other step is being voluntary about forgiveness which means only you can do it, not someone else but yourself. An example will be when you are in a quarrel with your partner, and this person does not want to own that he/she is wrong and blames you for what you did not do, but then you still choose to forgive that individual.
The truth is unless you let go, unless you forgive yourself, unless you forgive the situation, unless you realise that the problem is over, you cannot move forward.
The process is not an overnight process. It takes time. For me, I have to call out that person name, and I have to keep repeating it from my hearts of hearts in meditation to say I have forgiven that person. I also have to talk about it to know I am in the process of forgiving that person because I choose to do it with willingness and time.
Finally, this is all about consideration and empathy. You can check my post on https://princessanyasodor.com/2020/09/06/do-you-think-our-modern-society-lacks-empathy/. Forgiveness is also about having the power to live your life with a sense of hope, joy, resilience, understanding and compassion because you are working on yourself. I am still learning, trying and meditating because this life no easy oooo. When people show you (shege),😔 you want to revenge, but then you think about it and understand that that person does not know any better. P.S (shege means problems or when people show you their true hurtful sides)
I will stop here and would love to hear some of your opinions on how you forgive people or do you even forgive? Please comment below and we can chat.
Thank you for the love ❤️ we see back here tomorrow for Daily Post Day 6.
Do you always have that gut feeling? When you know something is off, and you don’t have peace about a situation and a person? Do you sometimes have that little voice that comes so fast and slips away like it was never there?
Today we will be talking about the practical side of discernment and how you can listen to your gut as it can prevent or forewarn you on what’s about to come.
Firstly, what is Discernment?
It is defined as the ability to decide between truth and error, right and wrong. Discernment is also the ability to make careful distinctions in our thinking about the fact. In other words, it is the ability to think biblically.
For a while now, I have been reading about what it means, and to be honest, it is mainly linked 🔗 to various biblical quotes and readings of the Bible. It is a gift that comes from God, and that each of us has this gift as an insight to penetrate past a person veneer and the surface of a situation and also past the words that a person is using to judge people and situations accurately and when I say judge I do not mean passing judgment on as I wrote on my other post https://princessanyasodor.com/2020/02/03/judging-others🎤🎤/ I mean judging as in assessing and evaluating.
When you are tapping into your gift of discernment, you can access and evaluate people in their motives and the situations that you find yourself in. This post discusses how to know when to listen to your inner guts and tap into the flow and let God show you what you need to do in any given situation.
Now you are thinking about what this is. These are those precise and concise words that flash through your mind or linger behind your mind like. For example, there is a nice person you know, but whenever you are around that person, you always do not connect with that person, or your friend tells you to come with them to a party and you have this little voice telling you not to go, or a mother who tells her son not to go out with some friends for a reason she actually cannot place her finger on, and so on. Some examples of these words are;
Get out now
Get more information
Don’t talk or hold your thought
Pick up the phone and call
Say I am sorry
These feelings, or skill, as I would put it, is up to us to nurture that seed of discernment that we have inside of us. So that when it’s time to discern people in their motives and situations it can be utilised. It can be nurtured in various ways, like through meditation or prayer. The more time you spend alone meditating or praying, the better tuned your spirit is to reading people better and seeing through their charades. These thoughts sometimes make you not sleep at night because it weighs heavily on your mind. When you have these thoughts, you desire one thing, but in retrospect, it is not suitable for you.
Do you know that saying? That Every disappointment a blessing? Oh yes! Sometimes it is true! I am sure you must have also irked when you are around someone or even before getting into a relationship, but because that person was packaged just the way you like and want, you just decided to throw that intuition to the wind and then later it grows and bites your ass.
An important message is: when you are dealing with someone, you are also dealing with their frequency.
Ways to know and surrender to your inner self in discerning situations.
Surrending; paying attention to your inner self by meditating
Calmness; that peace of mind you have about something and sure enough to walk away from it because it’s not good for you even though you want it.
Empowerment; empowers us to act in accordance with our own lives and be able to act on our behalf
I have a friend who has the spirit of discernment, and it is an obvious one. Funny enough, when she tells her husband not to do something or to do something, he dismisses her. Then later that same thing, she warned him about rebounds, and he calls her a Wi###. ( you know 🧐)
Discernment is focusing on others and not on self because it allows you to assess if whatever situation you are in is good for you or not.
I will have to stop here for now and continue more on this topic next time. Please do leave a comment on how you see through the social mask people wear? And how do you deal with it? I will be happy to hear from you. Thank you
We will see here tomorrow on day four of daily post.
My dream of a better Nigeria 🇳🇬 is a Dream of a better me.
A better me bettering my surroundings, being kind, uplifting, motivational, aspiring and passionate to my people, friends, Family, coworkers and anyone i come in contact with.
A better Nigeria 🇳🇬 is a better me not collecting bribes, not coming to the notion of doing my neighbor bad, being covetous, hating on others struggles and not being contented with what i have.
A better me is a diligent worker. There is a saying in German that says;
“Pray as though no work could help, and work as though no prayer could help”
When I work hard, I have no time for anyone. I only have time in bettering myself .
Work is a short form of Productivity.
When I work hard, I tend to dream big because I know i will get there through my efforts and consistency. This notion does not work the other way round that is; when I don’t work but I tend to dream Big. NO!!!! It doesn’t work that way.
My dream of a better Nigeria is a better me helping the Blinds, the people with intellectual disabilities and people with moderate mental retardation. In all these cases and more is my country so back on the knowledge of these people.
A better Nigeria is when I stop complaining that Nigeria is bad and our leaders are corrupt and start to be a better me.
A better Nigeria is a better me bringing in focus on our strengths and the drive force behind us as a people.
Nigerians everywhere, anywhere, anytime are the most resilient, happy, cheerful people regardless of their situations.
It is better if we could start being better Nigerians by teaching ourselves and empowering ourselves to be able to empower the people around us.
I will try and I hope you all would too.
I AM A LIVING TESTIMONY.
P.S I would love ❤️ to see your comment on how you can better yourself and your country. Thank you 🙏.
I have seen Arse lickers, i have seen people who belittle themselves or think if they lick arses they would be pitied or given a share or rather be favoured.
According to oxforddictionaries the definition is ;
You all know we live in an arse-licking economy.
The realisation of your entity or rather your life comes in when you feel shrunked, crowded or overpowered than you can imagine. Then you start Feeling that you have no choice than to give in or even start agreeing against your principles and practices.
This is the life we live in, making people bend into not what we envisioned for ourselves but for the purpose of comfort and peace to reign.
Have you ever thought about people who goes against the comfort of others are seen as aliens? Or people who refuse to lick arses are seen as non compromising, too loud, empty space and also as stupid people untill this people start making money, or start making waves and also been heard.
You don’t have to conform, you don’t have to be quiet, you don’t have to listen to anyone or other people choices for you!!, You don’t have to put other peoples consideration before yours, you don’t have to live behind the norm of the societies you live in.
YOU HAVE TO BE YOU.
I tell myself Princess be you. Don’t let anyone try to say, you too loud, or you too happy, or don’t sing any more, or you too local, or you too old, or you too skinny, or you too fat or you won’t make it life or in a relationship, or you too sick or too fit.
Look don’t let anyone decieve you in saying too much of everything is bad. I think it is better to be or have too much as too less. If you like something go for it and if you dont like something change it or rather leave it.
Rather than licking arses to get what you want stand up for yourself and get something done!!
You can share your thoughts and experience of what you think. Would love to know.
These words i chant to myself as i was on the train going to work, when i finally realised… i had to get out from this cocoon of laziness i set in my brain. Since this month began, i have had this feeling of .. i don’t give a f💟k attitude on not doing anything. Which has really been a pain to me, cause i feel weak and useless doing nothing.
If you are out there and also feeling this way… raise your hands please😂🙋🙋
There are many types of i dont give a f💝k attitude and mine was the one that can make someone loses focus on his/her purpose in life. 😢😢😢 and thats definitly not my aim.
On my last Post I spoke about ‘what is your Purpose in life’ seriously i began to doubt me, myself and I 😒🙆🙆 in the sense that in this month of January, I had a NULL, ZERO, NO Orientation and Motivation mood in either reading, going to the University, being creative or the zeal to go to work.
I told a friend of mine (Opons) her nickname. How I was feeling and she said if everyone was feeling this way, definitely not me and I said why not? I mean everyone goes through this Phase in life and even more. So why not me?
So dont beat yourself so much… at least that’s what i tell myself 😂😂👸👸 and I try to think positive and know that no Condition is Permanent.
Every year people set goals on what to achieve… and some say they do whatever pleases them… 😂or (as the spirit leads). But for people like me it has to be clear. I have to know how, when, and what I have to do in order to see my thinking or dreams comes to Realisation. Maybe it’s because am a Virgo…… 😕😕😕
Anyways I had to write this to tell anyone who reads this that regardless of what you are going through, sickness, hardship, no Motivation, no orientation, no money, or if you lose someone. Bear it in mind that you are not alone and no one can help you rise out of whatever pit you are in if you dont talk to yourself.
Talk to yourself… every day and also pray.
Please share with me and others in the comment section below on how this year been so far.
Happy new year my darlings and great success and achievement in everything you do.
P.S. I also devote this Text to my Cousins the Georgewills and pray God consoles them on losing their father my Uncle and a friend who lost her Mum.
I have always asked myself this question but within the next second it leaves my mind or rather i thwart it away and focus on something else to organize in my brain.
Some people would love to travel, get married, have kids, learn new things, get rich, Study, buy expensive and Luxury cars, build good houses, meet their Idols, be Singers, renowned Artist and Professionals at whatever their choice of Career they choose.
I for one has always pondered what I wanted to be. As a kid I wanted to be a Doctor or an engineer (my family can attest to this I could repair practically everything… I mean tv’s and radios😛).
It was fixed in my head. But I loved to dance, listen to Music,(I could sing the whole playlist from the Radio), Pest people😂😛and also make people laugh.
I studied in the direction of my dreams but was not so sturdy like I thought I would be. Till I found what I love to do. Media.
Your purpose in life should be what Fulfils you. My childhood friend Blessing O. David said
Every one should find out what he has been called here for by God, and what God wants us to do with whom and how he wants us to do it.
I think for me its Happiness. Happiness is not a Livestyle but a choice between what works for you or rather what keeps you going, moving, motivates you, encourages you, wants to make you help others and also wants to make you live for another day.
Am still on the journey on finding my Purpose in life and also praying i keep getting directions on it.
My questions for you is, what is your purpose in life? And how do you intend to achieve it?